by Olusegun Mokuolu
(Nigeria)
Men can be categories into three. Same applies to women but my focus in the piece is on men. There are bad men, there are good men and there are Godly men. The danger I see with Christian ladies is that they fall prey of good men. Bad men can be easily be identified, though some would still foolishly fall at their feet in the name of love.
However, the most dangerous man is the good man. This might sound strange to some but give this piece some more reading before you draw your conclusion. I am writing this piece because of what I see and have seen all around me. I have seen Christian sisters who ignored warnings and went ahead to solemnize with a good man but great is their regret now. And I can see several on this same path, heading into pain and agony. I just wish their eyes could be opened. But feelings (not love) can be blinding.
The plan of God is that a godly man would marry a godly woman. Any other arrangement is only a time bomb of pain and unhappiness. Let’s assume we all can identify a bad man. What then is wrong with a good man? The big difference between a good man and a godly man is that while a godly man is fully surrendered to the Lord, a good man has not.
The good man is capable of falling in love, he’s capable of caring, he can be very nice and lovely but by nature he’s evil. The words of Jesus confirms this when he said “If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?” (Matthew 7:11 KJV) It can be clearly seen from the words of Jesus that man being evil is capable of doing good. You can have a good man who is so caring but wants sex before marriage. No true godly man would do that. The good man might be interested in all areas of your life but not your relationship with God.
The godly man is a man who hates sin, does not love the world, love God and seek to please him. He’s is capable of doing good and being nice as well. He can also fall in love and treat his woman right. This does not mean he’s perfect. He may have a lot to learn but he has the right foundation which is Christ.
The good man is unpredictable. He can be nice and wonderful today and become a devil tomorrow. Can love and still be cheating. A lot of Christian sisters have been trapped in marriage with a good man. I therefore want to warn those who still have the chance to make the choice. Run away from a good man. All that glitter is not gold. Do not allow feelings to blind you. Use your heart and your head to make right decision. Even God said “Come let us reason together.” So it’s not out of context for you to use your reason.
Personally I believe that when two people who truly know the Lord and desire to please Him, come together in a relationship; things would turn out well. But many times we neglect God, go it our own way and then we return with story of pain and disappointment. We cannot blame God because we are responsible for our decisions.
Let me be a little clear and definite before I draw a curtain on the piece. No matter how nice, kind, wonderful, loving and good a man is, run away from him if he does not hate sin. If the man does not mind that you both commit sin, run away from him. If he loves the world and the things in the world, run away. Don’t fall into that trap. When you meet a man who is not interested in your own personal relationship with God, don’t give him a chance in your heart. I wish I have a better way of saying this. The pain and sorrow that comes with such men could be devastating. Marriages have been broken because of this. People have committed suicide. Some have been killed by the very same man they claim to be good. You cannot sit on the fence. You either go about your relationship God’s way or devil’s way. There is no mid way. The devil is the father of every man who has not surrendered completely to the Lord. When the devil is ready to frustrate your life, he knows how to control that man to do the most stupid and foolish things in the world.
Do not allow the temporary feelings of now to destroy your future. Make the right decision for yourself. You will be glad you did. If you feel you are already in a wrong relationship, don’t be afraid to come out of it. It may seem hard now, but in the end, you will live happily after. It is better to suffer the pain of breaking a bad relationship for few months than to spend the rest of your life suffering the pain of a bad relationship. Go godly; a word is enough for the wise!
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